Here’s the situation: There are so many opinions in the world and so many people who can’t handle other people’s opinions!  Why?

Do you know what annoys me?  I know, it’s hard to narrow down to just one thing!  When people make sweeping, matter-of-fact statements in a way that leaves no room for you to respond or feel otherwise.  “________ is the greatest musician of our generation, period!”  Or, when someone tells you what you or other people should’ve done.  “You should’ve…”, “they should’ve…”.   Thanks tips, it’s a little late now!  Also…all of those are just opinions.  Your opinions, and I might disagree with them.  My disagreeing with them doesn’t make me any more right or you any more wrong though.  It’s just a difference in opinion, but lately it seems like people cannot handle when someone has an opposing view!

I’m Just Here For the Comments

We see this overtly played out on social media.  Wanna witness immaturity in action – just go to the comments section!  To me, the comments are the equivalent of children holding their thumbs to their head, wiggling their fingers and saying “neener neener neener”, but sadly it’s the adults who are acting so ridiculous.

Our discomfort with an opposing view is another contributing factor to why we have such a cancel culture.  Don’t like what someone has to say or what they stand for?  Cancel everything they’ve ever done.  Disregard everything thing they’ve ever said.  Cut them out of humanity, their existence is now meaningless.  They must be silenced and we must be heard!  I understand if you want to stand up for a cause or stand up for justice, but also know, everyone is entitled to their own opinion and you ‘canceling’ them, isn’t necessarily going to change how they feel!  So what’s your desired outcome?  And do you think you can achieve it simply by pretending something or someone no longer exists?

A Christian, An Agnostic & A Muslim Walk Into a Bar

I’m fairly opinionated and at times I have no problem voicing that (often unpopular) opinion either.  I even enjoy a healthy heated discussion, but I learned many years ago that sometimes it’s best to just mind your own business!

It was a conversation I walked in on with 2 people I know very well.  One, a Muslim and one, well, just a loudmouth who loves to be heard!  They were debating the Bible and the Quran and women wearing a head covering.  I listened for a few minutes as the Muslim guy spoke about the Quran and the loudmouth about what the Bible has to say.  He actually wasn’t wrong, but he also wasn’t explaining the reasoning behind what the Bible says or old testament (old law) vs. new testament (new law).  It got to a point where I could no longer stand idly by and listen to a guy that does not attend church, does not practice any sort of religion and does not actually read the Bible, talk about it like he was some kind of scholar!  And so, I piped in.  All I wanted to do was give further explanation into why the Bible says what it says, as someone who understands it as an “insider”!  Instead, the loudmouth was now trying to lecture me about the Bible.  (Add that to my list of annoyances – when people try to educate me on something I’m actually more familiar with than them.)

That conversation was quite possibly the last time I ever voluntarily interjected when I wasn’t involved from the beginning!  What I learned from that and other conversations I’ve had, is that most times, people are not wanting to have a discussion to hear what you have to say from a curiosity standpoint.  They’re not looking for more information so that they can see another side or to change their own point of view; they just want to argue to try and sway you and if they can’t do that, then they at least want to make you look or feel like a fool!

Discussion Vs. Argument

Discussion – the action or process of talking about something in order to reach a decision or exchange ideas.

Argument – an exchange of diverging or opposed views, typically a heated or angry one.  A reason or set of reasons given with the aim of persuading others that an action or idea is right or wrong.

Opinions Are Like @$$holes – Everybody Has One

As an aside, why do we put so much stock into someone else’s opinion anyway?  They’re not us!  They didn’t have our upbringing.  We haven’t shared in our formative years and experiences, so they don’t have our thoughts or our feelings.  Have you ever wanted to go see a movie with a friend, but that friend says “it got really poor reviews”.  Ok, and?  It’s not going to deter me if I really want to see something.  I’ll make that judgement for myself.  Or have you ever read a newspaper review about a concert you were at the night before?  I have, many times, and while I probably thought the concert was great and enjoyed every minute of it, the writer spends the whole article criticizing everything from the opening act, right through to the encore.  Yes, well, that’s what happens when you send a 50 year old, hard rock loving man to a pop concert – he’s not going to enjoy it because it’s not his thing!  It’s an OPINION, but too often people are taking opinions as facts.

Or someone might voice an opinion on social media and within seconds, someone else is there to attack it.

“I’m really starting to be skeptical of the measures we’ve been told to take to keep ourselves safe from Covid-19.  Are they actually doing anything?  Why is the media insistent on perpetuating fear around something that has a 98% survival rate?”
– I can’t believe you would even post such a statement!  You should really educate yourself.  Hundreds of people are dying every day and you’re too good to wear a mask?!

…hold up – what?  How did one get that from the other?  That’s not even what they said at all!  And if you’re so offended by someone’s OPINION, there’s this little button that says Unfollow or even Mute, so that you don’t have to see what you don’t want to.  And you don’t need to announce it either.  “UNFOLLOWING.”  Why do we feel like if we disagree, we must disagree to the death?

Iron Sharpens Iron

As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.

– Proverbs 27:17 (NLT)

I’m sure you’re familiar with a version of this, even if you didn’t realize it originated from the Bible.  It’s a verse that uses something practical to illustrate a lesson.  I’ve seen an episode or two of Forged in Fire, but I’m no expert on bladesmithing (or whatever you call it), so the process may be different now, but back in the times when this verse was written, they would use one iron blade to sharpen another iron blade and in turn, both became a more effective tool.  Without the presence of the other, it was impossible to become sharper and both blades would be dull and useless.  I’ve always understood this verse to be something of two agreeable relationships strengthening each other, probably because of the use of the word “friend”, but depending what translation you read, sometimes it says “so one person sharpens another” (NIV).  Interesting.  “Another” might not necessarily be a friend, but I think the lesson can still apply!

Sometimes I feel like more people would be better off if they were like me!  They’d be organized, good with finances and their lives wouldn’t be so dramatic all the time, but I also know that I don’t want a world full of me’s out there – one is bad enough!  We actually need various personalities and opinions and I think opposing viewpoints can even help problem-solve at times.  Imagine you were trying to find a cure for a disease or invent something that would revolutionize the world.  What if everyone thought the same way as you?  Sure, you’d all be in agreement and everything would be peaceful, but also, no one would come up with new ideas.  No one would challenge old ideas.  There would be no progress.  So why are we so bothered when someone has a different opinion than us?  Our different opinions might actually be sharpening each other into a more effective tool!

Mind Your Own Beeswax

The few times I read the comments on a post of someone I follow, I usually find myself getting fired up and wanting to respond…but I don’t, because I know it’s not going to help anything!  Then I think about the people who regularly engage in comment wars.  They must be so stressed out all the time!  Life is hard enough, why would I voluntarily take on the burden of opposing your opinion?  And why do I care so much about convincing you your opinion is wrong?  Like I said before, it’s just an opinion and you’re as entitled to yours, as I am to mine.  I feel like people are afraid that if they don’t publicly oppose someone’s opinion, others will think that they agree with it.  Just because you don’t outright speak against something, doesn’t automatically mean you’re for something!  And I can tell you this much – resolution rarely happens in the comments section on social media, with strangers!

I’m not saying you have to like people with different opinions and I’m not saying you should blindly follow the masses either.  I just think sometimes it’s best not to engage.  Sometimes you need to agree to disagree.  Yes, think for yourself and don’t take opinions as facts and when you hear something, use discretion.  Use common sense.  Use logic.  If possible (like in real life), have a conversation, don’t have an argument.  Be inquisitive.  Find out why someone thinks the way they think without having an ulterior motive.  And sure, have your opinions, but be open to having your opinions changed too!  That doesn’t make you flaky, that actually shows you have character!  BUT…that’s just my opinion!